I am back with a new post after putting my blog into hiatus for a good few months, I thought I’d check back in with an update on why I decided to do this and where I am now. Now time for a bit of story time…hold on it’s going to be a long one!
This story goes way back to about April 2015. I was going about my normal day, I don’t actually remember the details of the day but what I do remember is having this strange dull ache on my left side that wouldn’t budge. I wasn’t too worried but I took it upon myself to go to the doctors after a week of pain. After seeing my doctor, he knew it was my ovary straight away and sent me for a ultrasound scan – basically what you have when your pregnant. In this scan it was revealed that I had a 4cm cyst hanging out on my left ovary but it wasn’t a concern as it was under 5cm. After a few more weeks the pain went away and all was well again in my world.
Three months later the pain came back again, just in time for my follow up scan. It was revealed I had two 2cm cysts on my right ovary which again wasn’t a concern. This time something was different. I woke up the following morning with the most agonising pain I had ever experienced in my life. I couldn’t see, I couldn’t walk, I couldn’t put words together properly. It felt like I had my right ovary explode inside me. I didn’t know what this pain was but looking back now I was pretty stupid to not go get checked out at hospital. I called my doctor on the Monday as it happened on the Saturday, he said the cyst had probably ruptured. The doctor then when onto explain that it could be something called “endometriosis”. At this point I had not really heard of the condition, I only ever had one girl speak about it and that was a girl I went to uni with (Shout out to Natasha). Nastasha’s story was moving and I thought that wouldn’t happen to me but there I was , being told about a condition I barely knew anything about. All I knew was it can be such a debilitating condition.
After seeing my doctor I was referred to a gynaecologist. I had to wait a while for my appointment but in this time I was left with constant pain mainly in my left side. After waiting a while for an appointment I was examined. I was told I don’t have endometriosis because “she couldn’t feel it” but I said it was my ovaries that was getting the most pain. It was put down to the cliché “IBS” which I knew it wasn’t. I was told I should receive a follow up appointment in three months.
As time went on – 9 months to be exact. Still no appointment. The pain was still there but more frequent. I decided to go back to my doctor and he pushed for my follow up appointment. I never wanted an appointment so bad. I wanted and needed to get this sorted. In the appointment I was told again nothing is wrong it’s just IBS but this time I said it wasn’t, I knew something is wrong. I was then offered to have a laparoscopy to see if I had endometriosis on my ovaries. When you are given the opportunity to either have surgery or not is such a big decision. I’ve never had surgery before and I honestly wanted to say no because I was terrified but I knew it would be stupid to say no.
Fast forward to October 11th 2017. The day of my surgery. I was terrified. I luckily was the first person to go in so I didn’t have hours of nervous waiting. I went through to the anaesthetic room and the nurses were lovely. The one guy was joking around with me about my converse and the other nurse was being hilarious. I was told I’d only be under for 30 minutes which didn’t seem bad at all. I looked at the time on the big clock above me…8:27am. I thought it will be all done for 9am and I can go home and be looked after by my boyfriend. My cannula was inserted in my left hand by a student nurse and that was it, I was asleep.
I woke up from my surgery, looked at my hand and my cannula was in my right hand. Wut? I then noticed I had about 3-4 nurses surrounding me asking me if I have problems with my heart?! I was so drugged up I was like WHAT THE HELL ARE THEY TALKING ABOUT MY HEART? AM I GOING TO DIE? As I came round a nurse explained to me that I had SVT ( Supraventricular tachycardia) basically that means that my heart went over 120 best per minute so they needed to keep me in overnight. I was gutted and scared. I wanted to go home and be with my mum, but I tried not to get upset about it. While having a ecg in the recovery room, I had my surgeon come to me regarding the surgery. I was told it took longer than anticipated (1 hour 45 mins) as there was quite a bit of endometriosis around my left ovary and some on the right. I couldn’t believe it. I was in shock that I knew something was wrong and I wasn’t taken seriously. I looked and I had three cuts on my tummy and I was filled with gas so I was very swollen.
Fastforward another 3 hours. I was in my ward at this point, my mum and boyfriend came to see me and I felt much more relaxed but I was still full of gas from the opp and I was generally uncomfortable. In this gap between the next visiting hours, I had my gynaecologist surgeon come to talk to me properly about the outcome of my surgery. I was told I had quite a bit of endo on my left side and my right ovary and that my womb had to be realigned, I was shown pictures of my insides which was such a weird thing to see. I was told that they couldn’t guarantee that it was all removed and it’s something that I would have to live with. This wasn’t the worst part of the news. The gynaecologist looked at me with a very sorry expression and said “If you want to have children Miss Healey, you would need to get started as soon as possible. You will struggle to conceive in future”. I felt like a car had hit me with shock. I am a woman, I was given the amazing gift to be able to carry a child and now my body wants to take that from me. I was gutted because I want to have children when I am ready, not when my body decides to put a time limit on things. I called my mum straight away to tell her. I knew my mum would be upset because I’m her only daughter. The only chance she will get to have the experience of pregnancy with her daughter. I’m writing this now with tears and a huge lump in my throat because the thought having that option taken away is so upsetting. Anyways I told my boyfriend and we agreed that we would have a child when we are ready and that made me feel better that there is always different ways if we were to have future problems. This really put things into perspective for me, if you take something away you will always want it more but you should never rush things if you are not ready.
After a month of recovery, I am not quite back to my normal life. I am still experiencing the after effects of surgery, I feel weak still and my body doesn’t feel right but I know I’m on my way to getting back to normal. This has been such a struggle emotionally and physically as I have had to come to terms with something I will have to live with for the rest of my life. Endometriosis is a condition that I don’t feel is taken seriously purely because not many people know what it is. 1 in 10 women have endometriosis.
Endometriosis is where the lining of the womb grows in the wrong place and sheds each month (bleeds). These can be places like ovaries, bowel, bladder and I’ve read that it was attached to someone’s brain! This is a condition that can cause extreme pain at any time of the month, nausea, pain during sex, pain during peeing or pooping etc. It can be agony.
If you want to read up on endometriosis or what help visit www.endometriosis-uk.org or visit your doctor and get help. Thanks for reading!!